Well I went to Mass General Tuesday to have my "procedure" done. I thought it was a procedure that would bring relief. How shocked I was to find out it was a mini test to see if I would be eligible for the nerve burning procedure. I failed. They will try again in January but if I had no relief this time then I am not holding my breath for next time. I don't like this new Dr. he doesn't listen....he sends an intern in to talk to me and go over everything then he pops in for a second and says "see you next time". He's rude too. I don't know what to do at this point. I'm tired and I'm frustrated. It's been 1 1/2 years and it's just too long. I need a Dr. like Dr. Gill. I may even try to find him and talk to him and have him recommend someone to me.
Then......my tooth broke. It broke bad and it hurt to the point I was eating motrin every 2 hours just to get a tad of relief. I didn't sleep for days and the motrin did a number on my stomach. I didn't eat for days. I have a hiatal hernia that I have had for years and motrin is a HUGE NO NO!
The dentist could finally see me on Thursday and I was thrilled.... until they took the x-rays and her face made some really bad faces and she said I needed to see a specialist ASAP. She said the tooth that was broken was a no brainer. It needs a root canal. It's the tooth behind the broken one that has them concerned. Now I had a root canal and a crown done 1 1/2 years ago. Yeah, he didn't do it right....which I had told him to begin with and the reason for the NEW dentist. Well that old tooth cost us a fortune that we are still trying to pay off. I got into the specialist the same day and find out I need ANOTHER root canal on that other tooth and a NEW CROWN. Which means 2 root canals and 2 crowns. BIG BUCKS we don't have!
I was so devastated that I burst into tears in the dentist chair and I couldn't stop. I knew it was going to happen one day soon. I just didn't expect it then. Too much has happened this year. I never cried. I thought it weird that I had never cried but I knew it was coming. Thursday was the day. It was just a bad day. The snow, Ray having to cough up the $1,000 the judge ordered us to pay because his work was holding his child support checks instead of mailing them (don't even get me started on this), the scared feeling I had walked around with all week wondering if we could raise the money so my husband wouldn't spend Christmas in jail because the judge refused to listen, the fact that we had to cough up $200 right then and there for them to fix my tooth, the fact that the snow was coming down so hard and I was worried about getting the kids from daycare on time, the fact that the weather is prohibiting me from doing part of my job properly and the fact that Christmas is 2 weeks away and Trevor asked for the impossible from Santa Claus. It all came crashing down on me in that dentist chair and I lost it. The whole office was trying to console me. I was a mess. Hungry, tired in an extreme amount of pain, it was all too much to bare. I cried for a good 35 minutes. They agreed to fix the tooth with $130 deposit but they would only fix it enough to end the pain. I took whatever they offered at that point. I was ok until I realized they ground my tooth down so badly that it no longer resembles a tooth. If you know me, you know I take great pride in my teeth. I was devastated by the time I got to the car.
I left Danvers at 2:15. I called Ray and was going to head back to work for a while but then we decided the snow was so bad I should just go get the kids. Well I got a call that daycare was closing early so I headed to Salem. It took me and hour on High Street alone. I hit Federal St in Salem at 3:15. I figured I would be to the kids by 3:25. I did't get to them until 4:00. It was awful. The traffic was unbearable. I dropped them off at the house, except for Trevor (I had 2 other kids too because their mother's were stuck in traffic). Trevor and I headed to the police station to park the car. We went inside to register it and some cop started screaming at me, in front of Trevor, that people actually work at the police station and need to be able to park too. Um.....excuse me....we were ordered to park there. That is our designated spot when there is no off street parking...WTH? I was so mad. I filled out the paper work and Trevor and I started to walk home. All was ok, I could feel the tears well up every once in a while but I managed to keep them at bay. Then Ray came home. I was so relieved he was home safe. We got a newspaper and I started reading it to him. Trevor was in a play the night before and his picture with his classmates was in the paper. They even quoted Trev's line. It was really cool. As I was reading it to Ray the flood gates burst open and I couldn't stop. I don't know why. I just cried and he just held me. It was non-stop for the rest of the night. I would walk into another room and just cry. I guess I just needed to let it all go. Then he started teasing me about my tooth later....he was just playing but I burst into tears again....this time in front of the kids. I hate to see their little faces when they see me cry. The worry on those faces kills me. I went to bed very early and had a much better day the next day.
Friday we went to our work Christmas party. Faith was so excited and then fell apart by the time we got there. She had 2 hives on her face all day, no doubt still from the flu mist, and she was completely overwhelmed by the fact that Santa was going to be there. As usual the boys were the life of the party and had a blast. They had this really cool balloon artist. He's in the Guiness Book. He made Trevor the horse that went around his entire body, the thing must have been 6 feet long, Brycen got a crocofile that went over his head and Faith got some puppies. Very cute. I didn't get good pictures but the photographer there did. I plan on ordering them when she uploads them. Ray even got into it and had his face painted! :) We really had a good time. Santa came and Trevor got the coolest Nerf gun that shoots about 10 rounds in 1.5 seconds, Brycen got a cool Nerf basketball game that you can play in the dark and Faith got her first ever BRATZ doll (mommy doesn't allow these but I guess this Santa thought otherwise :( )She was beyond thrilled. She better treasure it because there won't be another one in this house.
We got our tree last week and decorated it tonight. I will upload those pictures sometime this week.
I hope you all are having a better week than I. On a good note....I found the impossible Santa gift for Trevor. It's used and I don't know how I am going to explain it yet but at least he got it right??? Right???? Now lets hope it shows up before Christmas. I had to order it online....say a prayer for me....Please????
Cheers!
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