Growing pains

I find myself in a conundrum this morning. Raising children is not for the faint of heart. Raising boys, I am finding, is a breeze to raising a daughter. Faith is only 11 and I find myself in very scary, uncharted territory all of a sudden and I am not sure how we got here so quickly.

 A boy is calling. An 11 yr old boy that apparently has a huge crush on my baby girl. Judging from the googly-eyed look when she answers the phone, she reciprocates those feelings. Did I mention she is only ELEVEN?!! Eleven. Last week she was playing with Barbies and going on and on about all the new clothes she wants for said Barbies and this week she is talking to a boy on the phone. I want to cry. I want to rip this boy from limb to limb. I want him to leave my baby alone.

 The rule in our home is that she cannot date until she is 16. No ifs, ands or butts about it. If we had our way she wouldn't date until she was 25.

 I am also discovering that her friends with older sister's become interested in boys much more fervently. They are much more informed about things that I prefer my 11 yr old doesn't know anything about. Get two 11 yr old girls together and have a boy call and the giggles and squeals are non-stop. This is what happened last night. Faith's bff is here for the weekend.

 I don't ever remember being boy crazy at 11 or 12 or even 13. I didn't really date anyone until I was 15. Yes, I had a crush on one or two and I am sure that is all this is... BUT...this is MY baby. My girl. The one that climbs into MY lap for hugs and kisses and asks me to lay with her at night, the little girl that still calls me "MOMMY".

How can she be into boys all of a sudden??? I want to keep her little. I am not ready for this part yet. I am not ready for her to grow up, for boys to want to date her, for boys to call my house at 11:00 p.m. The thought of her kissing some boy makes me want to vomit. I know we are not there yet but trust me when I tell you, I think of it, and it sends me into a tizzy.

 I was having such a good day...then the phone started ringing off the hook, the giggles started &; my heart broke.

She is my baby, my last. The youngest and my only girl. Why do they have to grow so fast? I want to stop time. Freeze it. I want her to keep calling me "mommy" forever. I know this is my issue. I know that I can't keep her small forever. I know that not everyone sees a little girl in her Cinderella dress dancing around my house when they look at her...but I do..and I always will.

 Growing pains. Damn, they hurt.