Brycen asked me to sign him up for football this year. He was really nervous but excited the first night. He had a blast and Ray and I were thrilled. Same thing on day 2, 3 and 4....then day 5 came. They practiced, hitting and blocking. He hated it. He got very nervous before the practice on day 6...but he went. Then day 7 came....his anxiety kicked in. He had to have some medicine to calm his stomach down. I asked him if he was sure he wanted to do this...he said yes. He went to practice and was a mess when it was over.
It took everything he had to not cry... It took everything he had to ask me to buy him an ice cream from the ice cream truck. I knew if I said no he would melt into a puddle on the ground. Anyhow, day 8 came. I encouraged him to try it. To give it his best shot. I knew he was a mess on the inside but I wanted him to try and fight through it. I was hoping against hope that something good would happen and he would decide he really liked this sport. I personally think this would have been a good sport for him. He needs to toughen up a bit for his own good.
He got in the car after practice and told me he cried through 3/4's of it. He said he got the wind knocked out of him and he couldn't breathe and he was really scared. He said the other guys helped him out and gave him good pointers. He was worried that the other kids had been playing for 5 years and that this was his first year.
Ray gave him pointers. I asked Brenden too but alas, he was too self absored and said "no one ever talked to me about it....he'll be fine" but then he told me he would but didn't {sigh} .
The next night came and he was on the verge of vomitting. He was having a major panic attack and I knew he wasn't going to make it. I pulled him aside (out of earshot of his brothers) and told him he has nothing to prove to anyone. If he doesn't want to play he doesn't have to. I explained that while we normally finish something we start that he has my permission to quit. He started to cry and told me he didn't want to be a quitter but he hates it. He hates every thing about it. He was crying so hard. He broke my heart. He is not aggressive and he doesn't want to hit people. I told him it was fine. I had him call Ray at work and tell him and then I gave him a pep talk so that he could handle Brenden because I knew he would ride him hard for quitting.
I warned Brycen of Brenden's reaction. I have to say I was so proud of Brycen's next action. Brenden walked downstairs and Bryce looked him square in the eye and told him he was quitting. Brenden went off on him. Calling him a quitter etc. Brycen stood his ground. Trevor came to his defense. I yelled at Brenden but he asked me to just let him speak to his brother's alone. I left to pick up Ray. Trevor called me on the phone afterwards. Bren rode them hard for the next 4o minutes while I was gone. The only way they could shut him up was to promise to do 10 push-ups every night. They begged me to talk Brenden out of it. I just laughed. Brenden means well. I see his point even if the boys don't.
So he quit. Brenden texted me later to make sure the boys were doing their push-ups. I made them and Faith got in on it too. I took pictures with my phone and sent them off to Brenden. He was happy.
Faith was upset as she has joined the cheerleading squad and was really excited to cheer for her brother. She has gotten over it and is still going to cheer.
Brycen did a lot of growing these past 2 weeks. I am really proud of him. He has learned a lot of hard truths about himself. The fact remains that the boy has a heart of gold. He is not competitve in sporting situations and that's ok. He plays for fun and really isn't that what we teach them? Go out and have fun. I am glad he came clean and told me he hated it. I wouldn't want him on the field if his heart wasn't in it. He would have gotten hurt and that's no fun for anyone.
I will take the boys to the YMCA next week and sign them up. They have lots of adventure camps and I think they will enjoy them. They will find their nitch in the sporting world. I just think it's going to be more individual sports than team sports and that's ok.
No comments:
Post a Comment